Cassava Times

News (Satire) from the African Continent

Angola Soldier also good Azonto Dancer

Luanda ( The Cassava Times ) — Many Angolans, and common African citizens all over the continent, pleased to discover the Chief of Staff of the Angolan Armed Forces is … Continue reading

November 11, 2013 · Leave a comment

Evangelist Shocked to See Africans Not in Trees, Already Know Christianity

PORT HARCOURT (The Cassava Times) — Billy Bob Smith, successful evangelist and televangelist from Florida fainted for the first time in his life in the Christ Died, Was Buried, and … Continue reading

November 9, 2013 · Leave a comment

African Governments Appalled by Modern Slavery Allegations

ADDIS (The Cassava Times) — African leaders, in a unanimous press statement at the AU have shrugged off any allegations of forcing their citizens into modern day slavery. On the … Continue reading

November 8, 2013 · Leave a comment

Shoddy Roadwork Will Kill 18 People

LODWAR ( The Cassava Times ) — Residents of the Lodwar area in the Turkana region of Kenya have alerted government officials about the impending casualties to come if a … Continue reading

November 6, 2013 · Leave a comment

Tunisian Interim Government to Invest in Fire Alternative

TUNIS (The Cassava Times) — In a shocking press release, the Government spokesperson for the Tunisian interim government has revealed the administrations intention to ban fire from the nation. “We … Continue reading

November 6, 2013 · 1 Comment

Black Star tipped to Shine

ACCRA (The Cassava Times) ¬†— CASSAVA TIMES had the pleasure of speaking with¬†Ghanaian youngster Clifford Aboagye who has been hailed as one of the best 40 young players in Europe. … Continue reading

November 6, 2013 · Leave a comment

Health Close Call

ABUJA (The Cassava Times) — Unconfirmed sources hint that the son of Nigeria President almost had to go to a local hospital this evening. As outrageous as it sounds, an … Continue reading

November 1, 2013 · Leave a comment